We did it. We offered a meal of spaghetti and meatballs. My parents, niece and nephew, my son’s girlfriend, and a friend and her daughter joined our family of five. My parents brought brownies, my friend brought salad and soda. We had a nice dinner with good conversation followed by a lively round of Apples to Apples. It was a great night.
It just wasn’t what I had anticipated. I expected to have a house full. I expected the entire community to line up to get a seat around my dining room table, to fight over my company. How conceited is that? I felt disappointed. Emotions can be so weird, after all, there were 12 people present, all of which I adore and love to spend time with and yet I just confessed to feeling disappointed.
Did I mention, I want to be real? I have to be real. I am real, not a picture perfect Christian with ‘Jesus, others, you’ priorities in a neat little row. You would see right through that anyways.
I did the only thing I really knew to do. I prayed about Friday Night Meatballs. Yes that may seem silly to some but I truly believe in a relationship with my savior, Jesus Christ. He cares about me and wants to hear about every area of my life. I take my questions, concerns, successes, and failures to Him. It’s part of who I am and who I want to be.
So I prayed for contentment with whomever God sends, if anyone. I questioned my motives. Did I seek Him first? Was this plan from him or was this my doing? Would my time be better spent elsewhere? What is my intention? What made me disappointed?
What I discovered: My motives were much more selfish than my invitation had suggested. Friday Night Meatballs is more for me than you. I want to connect with other Christians in a deeper way, to fellowship, to build closer friendships. I’ve ask him to bless this and make it what he wants it to be.
And just like with God’s grace I get to try again. Not to host a larger crowd but to participate. To enjoy a simple meal with a guest list of 2 or 22. To laugh, to share, to relish your company. Yes it is still an open invitation and I do hope you join us but if you never do…. I will not be disappointed.